Friday, April 26, 2024

Happy Incompetence

I've always got a kick out of playing D&D, and especially the co-operative storytelling aspect of it.  Specifically, it's co-operative storytelling about a bunch of characters who are insane and/or bad at what they do.  It's weaponised incompetence, and so much fun.

Case in point:  in a recent session, the party was in town and found out that a Big Bad was coming to get them.  They needed to leave town immediately.

The initial plan was as follows:

  1. Walk out of town, past the guards and through the gate, like normal people.

Now, being D&D, that wasn't going to happen.  The players immediately launched into a spirited, if futile, discussion of how we were going to do this.  Everyone whose character had a special ability wanted to find a way to use that special ability in the course of the plan.  

So, after lord knows how long, the final plan went something like this:

  1. Break into three groups.
    • Group A:
      1. one character walked out through the main gate like a normal person
      2. one character struck up a conversation with the guards, oversharing to the point of making the guards suspicious
      3. one character tried to pickpocket the guards
      4. one character turned into a highly-conspicuous magical horse, then convinced another character to ride them out through the gate, making the guards suspicious
    • Group B:
      1. two characters went to the dock to smuggle themselves out on a ship; one somehow drowned
    • Group C:
      1. one character used their contacts with the thieves guild to get themselves smuggled out of the city through the sewers or something

I'm not 100% sure about the details, because no one was.  But, while incurring only 1 in 8 fatalities, we made it out of the city.  At this point, we we realised that no one had thought of how we should all meet up again.  A bunch of stuff had to be retconned so the adventure could continue.  

And that's the fun of adventures and storytelling: whatever you think is going to happen, won't happen, and everything is going to go to hell.  But if you're all sitting around the table laughing like idiots and having a great time, who cares?

Also, I should introduce my own character, Father Hiram the halfling cleric.  I used HeroForge to create his character in 3D, then bought a full-colour 3D-printed miniature of the little twerp.  I was amazed at the quality of the end result.  Awesome stuff.

Father Hiram, the cleric who thinks the gods are a bunch of jerks.

In other news, the first draft of the new book is going great!  I'm at 75000 words and counting, and just starting the buildup to what will be a wonderfully chaotic climax.  The characters are really starting to shine, and I'm looking forward to introducing them to everyone.