Friday, March 2, 2018

Have you ever noticed...

I spent about twenty years working in corporate environments.  I dwelt in cubicles, toiling away for some of the least-respected companies in Canada.

In that time, I noticed a lot of things going on.  Things that make cynics feel entirely justified in their cynicism.

For instance, there were a lot of military- and war-themed metaphors.  At one point or another, I heard all of these used in the workplace:

  • execute on a strategy
  • launch a new campaign
  • drop the bomb
  • take the hit
  • attack a problem
  • capturing market share
  • fall on my sword
  • provide cover
  • targeting a market
  • lead the charge
  • managers spending time in the trenches
  • battleground markets
  • employees as troops

Why is that?  Is it an unspoken admission that the job isn't fulfilling?  That what they're doing lacks drama, or nobility, or any identifiable moral purpose?  I don't know, but I do know that mentioning it meant I "wasn't a team player".

Maybe it was just a function of the time period.  I've been away from the corporate world for a few years now, and for all I know they now use Pokemon-based metaphors.  I think I'd very much prefer that.

Leveraged synergistic paradigms, I choose you!

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